Fer Rivas

A moving letter to her father in which the author reveals everything she never dared to share with him before his death.

A boy who is just sixteen years old enters the hospital room where his father lies in a coma, surrounded by machines that keep him alive. The boy knows he must say goodbye and that this is his last chance to confess to this dying man everything he has never told him: his true identity, and the shame and fear he has always felt in his company.

Jo era un noi is the long letter in which Fer Rivas tells her father everything she kept quiet during her childhood and adolescence. Written over a decade later, it is a journey of inquiry through scenes and events from her own life: her school environment, her first friendships, the advent of desire, and her family history – her grandparents who emigrated from Galicia to Barcelona in the 1950s, the SEAT factory, the family apartment affected by aluminosis. A quest whose goal is to finally understand her sexuality and identity.

A courageous, gritty text that dares to call things by their name – love, hate, class, desire, fear – and breaks the chain of transmission of an asphyxiating, oppressive masculinity passed down from grandfather to father and from father to son, thus beginning a path toward a new life.

“A book that takes us through the confusing paths of adolescence with a compass damaged by doubts and wounds.” Víctor Recort, El País

 “A depiction of a queer childhood that resonates with all those who did not fit into the norm in their early years of life. The shame, the fear, and the hopelessness of those who always felt different.” Alberto Sisí, Vogue

 “A raw account that reveals how origin, gender constructs, or silence can perpetrate extreme violence on people without any physical interaction.” Carmen López, eldiario.es

 "Jo era un noi is proof that personal experience, when filtered through generosity and ambition, becomes the kind of literature that speaks to us without relegating us to the role of mere spectators.” Míriam Cano

 “A letter to the father that oscillates between rage and compassion, a search for one’s own identity with a voice that is raw and poetic, direct yet gentle, guiding us tenderly along a very harsh path.” Marta Jiménez Serrano